Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
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